I was in a conversation with a friend where I mentioned that I envied her relationship with her mom. She recently called her mom when the frosting she was making wouldn’t thicken and since her parents lives close by, her mom said, come on over and I’ll help you. That sounded amazing. What I would do to be able to call my mom just to chat, to help me make frosting, or for all that other stuff moms are good at.
But alas, that was not my fate. This year I will be at the half way point- I will have lived half of my life without my mom. And while it has been less time since I’ve lost my dad, it was still way too soon. My friend said, I’d be so angry at the world, I don’t know how you do it.
So that got me thinking. How DO I do it? How do I still have a heart full of love and joy for life and for God when I’ve had to ride some pretty ugly waves? I thought about how much I wish I had parents to ask their advice. Chances are I might not take it (as children often don’t), but I would like the opportunity to hear their opinion on my financial decisions, on my parenting choices, or on my career path. I would love to be able to have another Sunday dinner where mom goes all out to feed whoever happened to stop in that day. How amazing would it be if my children knew and remembered those awesome people who raised me? It would be very easy to stop right here and just feel sorry for myself.
But then I remember my large, wonderful (at times crazy) family. I have sisters, brother-in-laws that are like blood, my cousins, my aunts and my husband’s family, and I feel blessed that I have such an assortment of trustworthy resources. When I blew a fuse in my trailer I had a brother-in-law to call about that; when I needed to make my first turkey dinner I sat down with my aunt who is an amazing cook and took notes; when I have a “dr. mom” question, I have a sister I call for that. My husband’s family is full of philanthropist role models that I hope to someday emulate. I am definitely not alone.
And my children, while they may not have MY parents here, they do have their other grandparents who love them and spoil them as grandparents should. The kids are so blessed to have them nearby and involved in their lives.
Most importantly, I think of my husband. Who thank God is the world’s best teammate in this wild game of life. Most often we are on the same page with life decisions, big or small. I am grateful that no matter my strife, that man is beside me 100%. Having a friend like that to lean on and to laugh with is an immeasurable blessing. I know that if I hadn’t lost my mom, I likely wouldn’t have taken the path that led me to meet him. If it was God’s will to take my mom, I am grateful that it was also his will to lead me to Joe.
Don’t get me wrong. As I write this I cry. It sucks to be orphaned- there is no denying that. But I also know that I have a lot of blessings, including the wonderful people who God has left here for me to share my life with. And for that, I am grateful.